Two Cows of Mike Hosking Explained World Economy Simpler

two-cow theory

Table of Contents

What is Two-Cow Theory:

These are 17 political or economic systems around the world, explained in a sarcastic way with the examples of two cows. World economy has been explained in a common man’s language. Though its for fun there is something to think.

This was shared by MikeHoskingBreakfast page in Facebook and has gone viral. There are new versions also started coming to the original ones.

How two cows explain world economy:

Venture Capitalism is an eye opener…LOL


  1. Communism:

You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.

  1. Socialism:

You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbor.

  1. Fascism:

You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.

  1. Bureaucratism:

You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other and then throws the milk away.

  1. Traditional Capitalism:

You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

  1. Venture Capitalism:

You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publically listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debit/equit swap with an associated general offer so that you get all of your cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.

The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the right to all seven cows back to your listed company.

The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one or more.

  1. An Italian Corporation:

You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are. You decide to have lunch.

  1. A French Corporation:

You have two cows. You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.

  1. An American Corporation:

You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.

Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow has died.

  1. A Swiss Corporation:

You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.

  1. An Irish Corporation:

You have two cows. One of them is horse.

  1. An Australian Corporation:

You have two cows. Business seems pretty good. You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.

  1. A Chinese Corporation:

You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity.

You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

  1. An Indian Corporation:

You have two cows. You worship them.

  1. An Iraqi Corporation:

Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell that you have none.

Nobody believes you, so they bomb the crap out of you and invade your country.

You still have no cows but atleast you are now a Democracy.

  1. A British Corporation:

You have two cows. Both are mad.

  1. A Greek Corporation:

You have two cows borrowed from French and German banks. You eat both of them.

The banks calls to collect their milk, but you cannot deliver so you call the IMF.

The IMF loans you two cows. You eat both of them. The banks and IMF call to collect their cows/milk. You are out getting a haircut.

Now that people have started giving their own suggestions for other Corporations or Economies as well. “The New Zealand Economy”, “The Hungarian Economy”, “The Japanese Economy”, “The Australian Economy”, “The Korean Economy”, “The Canadian Economy”, The Mongolian Economy”, “The Scottish Economy”, “The Polish Economy”, “The African Economy” etc. After the viral 17, MikeHoskingBreakfast has shared the above people suggested economies through his FB page.

Comment your favorite below!

Anson Antony

Anson Antony

Anson is a contributing author and founder at Learning anything new has always been his passion, is an outcome of his passion for technology and business. He has got a decade of versatile experience in Business Process Outsourcing, Finance & Accounting, Information Technology, Operational Excellence & Business Intelligence. During the tenure, he had worked for organizations like Genpact, Hewlett Packard, M*Modal and Capgemini in various roles and responsibilities. Outside business and technology, he is a movie buff who spends hours together watching and learning Cinema and a Film Maker too!

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